Living the Dream
01/14/2007 - Father Knows Best
I read an article this week by a well known pediatrician named Dr. Alan Greene. Dr. Greene is himself a father of four and has devoted his whole life to the care of children and their families. He's written books. He's appeared on radio and television. He speaks all around the world and was cited by the American Medical Association as the first physician to post a website on the internet way back in the dark ages of 1995. And if you go to his award winning website you'll read that he loves to think about challenging ideas, collect encyclopedias, and wear green socks.
And in the article I read Dr. Greene attempted to answer the question, "What does it take to be a great father?" And this is what he said, "When I talk with adults about their memories of their dads, and when I talk with children about what they want from their dads, what comes up most often is that children wish their dad were there more. They just want Dad to be with them. Whether it's cleaning, playing, working, studying or whatever - they want Dad to be with them in their activities. Kids feel like dads don't have enough time."
"Secondly, I've found that kids wish their fathers would listen to them. They often feel like Dad doesn't really understand. Active supportive listening is an incredible gift to your child. Believe in your child."
"The third wish I hear is for dads to speak to their kids. Talk. Open up. Many people feel that they don't really know what is going on inside their father. Being vulnerable with your child would be giving them an incalculable treasure."
If you grew with a father like that, a father who spent time with you, a father who listened to you, a father who talked to you, count your blessings. That man was one of God's greatest gifts in your life. And if he's still living call him up, take him out to lunch and say, "Thanks for being a great Dad." I guarantee you he'll remember that lunch the rest of his life. Because it's not easy being a great Dad which is why a lot of us didn't grow up with one and sometimes we envy those who did.
Over and over again in the words of the Sermon on the Mount Jesus is out to convince us that our God is a great Dad. Seventeen times he refers to God as our heavenly Father which alone was a huge stretch for a group of people on the hill that day who were scared to even whisper God's name. And it may be a huge stretch for you to believe that God is a great Dad especially if you grew up with a father who was less than great or maybe with a father who was not around at all.
"He's Dad," Jesus says, "and let me tell you a little bit about him.
He's a perfect Father. He is holy, one of a kind. The best Dad there could ever be. He's a loving Father, who loves even his wayward kids, even his enemies. He cares for the needy and rewards those who do the same. He loves when we talk to him, anytime, anywhere. He's never too busy to listen. He's quick to forgive, especially his kids who quickly forgive others. He takes good care of his children. And those who put his kingdom first never have to worry about a thing. That's God, that's our heavenly Father."
And there are some other things about our heavenly Dad that Jesus wants to tell us about and they're found in the passage that we're going to look at today. If you have a Bible turn with me to Matthew 7:7. This morning we continue our series called Living the Dream with a teaching I've called "Father Knows Best." I know it sounds like the title of an old television show. Anyone here remember it? Good. I'm not alone.
Listen to Matthew 7:7-12, Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to
you. 8For everyone who asks receives; those who seek find; and to those who knock, the door will be opened. 9Which of you, if your children ask for bread, will give them a stone? 10Or if they ask for a fish, will give them a snake? 11If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him! 12So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets.
Sitting on the hill that day Jesus makes some amazing claims about our heavenly Father. And this is one of them. He says, "God wants to hear from you. God wants you to ask him for things. He wants you to knock on his door. It's never locked. And there's no 'Do Not Disturb' sign hanging from the door knob of your Dad's office. He's never too busy for you. He's not like most dads who don't have enough time. He's got all the time in the world for you. You are his number one priority."
Actually, in the Greek language these words of Jesus are better translated, "Keep on asking and it will be given to you. Keep on seeking and you will find. Keep on knocking and the door will be opened to you."
Already in this great sermon Jesus has told us what to pray for, now he's encouraging us to persist in prayer. In the Lord's Prayer, in Matthew 6, he taught us to pray for his kingdom to come and for his will to be done on earth as it is heaven. He taught us to pray for our daily needs to be met and for our relationships to stay strong and for protection against temptation and evil.
Speaking of the Lord's Prayer I've got to show you this Christmas gift that I received in the mail this year from a relative of mine in Germany. His name is Dietmar and he sends us a Christmas package every year. But this year he sent me the world's smallest Bible.
Can you see that? Of course you can't because it's the world's smallest Bible and it comes with a magnifying glass to read it. It's not the whole Bible. It just contains the Lord's Prayer. But it has the Lord's Prayer in seven different languages and every page has been engraved on metal in a type foundry and wasn't reduced on a copy machine. Its hand bound in leather and decorated with gold stamping. So stay away and don't try to steal it from me. You could hide this Bible in your ear! Dietmar wouldn't like that and I wouldn't either.
But it's in the Lord's Prayer where Jesus tells us what to pray for and now he's saying, "Don't stop praying for those things! Keep on asking. Keep on seeking. Keep on knocking because if you do, then you'll receive, then you'll find, then the door will be opened to you."
Our problem is that we often give up on prayer way too easily. We knock once. We knock twice and get we get no answer so we stop knocking and go away. I know I do. Sometimes we give up on prayer because at some deep level we wonder if prayer really works. Maybe we prayed for a sunny day and it rained. Maybe we prayed for a person to get healed and they didn't get healed. Maybe we prayed for a friend to trust Christ and they haven't trusted Christ yet. Maybe we prayed to be married and we're still single. Maybe we prayed for our troubled marriage to be reconciled and it's not. And after four or five letdowns like that we start to lose confidence that prayer really works, so we're tempted to stop praying.
But Jesus says, "Don't stop! Ask God to deliver you from that temptation and keep persevering in prayer." Don't let unanswered prayer keep you from praying. In fact, I don't think there is such a thing as unanswered prayer. God hears and answers them all, but not necessarily the way we want them to be answered.
God never promises to give us everything we ask for. All our prayers will not be answered, "Yes." If they were, then we would be God telling him what to do. And the whole world would revolve our comfort and convenience.
I love what someone has said about the way God answers prayer. If the request is wrong, God says, "No." If the timing is wrong, God says, "Slow." If you're wrong, God says, "Grow." But if the request is right and the timing is right and you're right, God says "Go!"
One of the longest prayers I ever prayed was for my Dad to come to know Christ. My mother, brother and I prayed for Dad for years, for decades. And there were many times that I was tempted to throw in the towel and sometimes I did. I just gave up that God would answer that prayer. But it was passages like this and others in the Bible that would get me praying again.
And I'll never forget when the phone rang on September 30, 1996, and my brother, Ken, said, "Bruce, are you ready for some good news?" And I said, "Sure. What's up?" And Ken said, "Dad prayed to trust Christ last night!" He was 76 years old when he did and that will always remain a lesson to me of the power of persistent prayer. "Keep on asking. Keep on seeking. Keep on knocking," Jesus says.
Jesus goes on to tell us more about our heavenly Father in verse 9 when he says , Which of you, if your children ask for bread, will give them a stone? 10Or if they ask for a fish, will give them a snake? 11If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him!
Our heavenly Father is a good Dad who loves to give good gifts to his kids. He doesn't trick his children and play nasty jokes on them. He wouldn't do that. Jesus chooses some very careful analogies here to make his point. "If children ask for bread, he says, "will their father give them a stone?" Where Jesus lived smooth, round lime stones on the beach looked exactly like the shape and color of little loaves of bread. So if a son asks his father for bread is he going to mock him by giving him a stone that looks like bread, but is going to break his teeth? "Of course not," Jesus says, "earthly fathers don't even do that."
And what if your daughter asks you for a fish for lunch, are you going to give her a snake? The snake Jesus is referring to is most likely an "eel." And according to the Jewish dietary laws of the day eels were not to be eaten. They were declared unclean. In other words, you're not going to play a bait and switch game with your daughter and give her something that's against the law for her to eat. No father is going to do that, not even those who are evil.
In the same passage in Luke's gospel Jesus adds a third analogy when he says in Luke 11:12, And if your children ask you for an egg, will you give them a scorpion? The scorpion was a dangerous little critter with claws like a lobster that would grab its prey and then its tail would come over its back and sting its victim to death. But when the scorpion was at rest and its claws and tail were folded in it had the color and the shape of an egg. So again Jesus says, "What dad would give his son or daughter a scorpion that could kill them instead of a scrambled egg for breakfast? No dad would do that."
So what is Jesus saying here? Is he saying that God will give us everything we ask for all the time? Is this a blank check with God's signature on it? So instead of asking for bread we can substitute the lottery. Or instead asking for a fish we can ask for our dream house. Or instead of wanting an egg we can put a bid in for a Super Bowl and get our requests answered "yes" all the time! Is that what Jesus is saying? I don't think so.
His point is not that God will give us everything we ask for. His point is that God is a good Dad and our heavenly Father knows best what we need and when we need it. He is not a sadistic, cruel, vicious God who gets his jollies out of playing pranks and tormenting his children. Our heavenly Father loves us. Our heavenly Father is for us. And Father knows best.
I certainly don't understand everything about prayer and how it affects God. Much of it remains a mystery to me which is why I agree with what Archbishop William Temple once said, "There's a lot about prayer I don't understand. All I know is that when I pray, coincidences happen. But when I stop praying, coincidences stop happening." Keep on asking. Keep on seeking. Keep on knocking.
In his commentary on this passage Tom Wright says, "If God is our Father, let's treat him as a Father and not a bureaucrat or dictator who wouldn't want to be bothered with our trivial and irrelevant concerns. The fact that there may be a war going on in one country, a famine somewhere else, earthquakes, tragic accidents, murder and pillage all over the place is no problem whatsoever for our loving Father. When he says he's still got time, space and love to spare for us, we should take him at his word."
"Of course, as we become mature children we will increasingly share his concerns for his suffering and sorrowing world. We will want to pray for it more than for ourselves. But, within the kingdom prayer that Jesus taught us we were taught to pray for what we ourselves need here and now. So what's stopping us? Ask. Seek. Knock. And see what happens! Expect some surprises on the way, but don't expect that God will ever let you down."
And then in verse 12 Jesus gives us what has come to be known as "The Golden Rule." So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets.
In other words, treat people with the same respect, love, care and concern that you would want to receive from them. And if you do that you don't need a bunch of rules and regulations to live by. "This one statement," Jesus says, "sums up the essence of the whole Old Testament law."
And if you listen carefully you can hear the buzz that's going through the crowd right now. "That's it? That's the bottom line? We don't need to do all these things the Pharisees and the teachers of the Law are brow beating us about? Can it be that simple? Treat others the way you want to be treated. That's it?"
You can see the scowls on the faces of the Pharisees who are feeling exposed by Jesus. "If that's it," they're thinking, "then we're out of business because we're all about building and maintaining and promoting an elaborate, complicated system of rules and rituals that must be followed to the letter of the law in order to please God. This guy's a threat to what we're all about."
And Jesus was a threat. And it was statements like this that eventually cost him his life. But Jesus wasn't the first or the last great moral teacher to propose the Golden Rule. Others had said it or things like it. Confucius the famous Chinese philosopher who lived 500 years before Jesus flipped it over and said, "Don't do to others, what you would not have them do to you."
But what separates Jesus from others who have said similar things is that underneath the moral lesson is the love of our heavenly Father. That message of Jesus was unique. And knowing that God loves his kids like that is what motivates us to gladly and to freely obey the Golden Rule. It's a big way that Christ followers live out the dream of God and help bring heaven to this earth.
What makes a great dad? A father who spends time with you, who listens to you, who talks to you. You may not have had one on earth, but you certainly have one in heaven and he knows best.